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Detaching from the mind’s idea of what you’re feeling

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Detaching from the mind’s idea of what you’re feeling

02 February 2022

We’ve all heard our mind say things like “I feel like shit” or “I’m completely overwhelmed”. What often happens next is that we react to this statement like it’s true and a terrible thing that either needs to be fixed asap or something to feel hopeless and defeated about.

But what if instead of getting carried away in reactions to the statement, we were to look at the statement itself? Is it really true? Am I in fact feeling like a pile of shit? (However a pile of shit really is feeling…)

In this episode of the Uncover YOU podcast, I guide you in questioning the story from the mind about how you’re feeling and how to find out what you’re really feeling. You might be surprised to find that more often than not, you feel a lot better than shit.

Listen to episode 38 here:

A summary of what I talk about in this episode:

A common construct of the mind:

  1. Your mind blurting out a statement of what you’re feeling, for example:
    I feel like shit
    (Or f*cking tired, stressed, overwhelmed, stuck etc…)

👇

  1. Then reacts to that statement:
    What’s wrong? What have I done wrong /not done?
    (Often in a worried, stressed tone of voice.)

👇

  1. Then trying to come up with a solution:
    What do I need to do to not feel this way?
    (The faster it can come up with a “doing” solution the better. Take vitamin B, meditate more regularly, exercise, journal etc.)
    OR
    Decide to feel hopeless and defeated about it.

 

Look at the steps above again. Can you see the gaps between them and that the gaps are filled with hidden agreements? That there is something wrong with feeling what you’re feeling. That it’s because of something you’ve done/haven’t done. That there is something you should “do” to not feel this way.

These hidden agreements can be very helpful to look at to dissect and understand the construct of a layered reaction like this and to find hidden fears and beliefs, but today we’re actually going to look at the initial statement. The assessment, or description, of how you’re feeling.

The consequence of overly-focusing on your mind

A big part of the self mastery work is to direct attention onto our minds. Partly to move into the observer instead of being inside the stories, believing we’re the ones telling them. Another reason is to investigate what beliefs are behind the stories the mind is telling so we can get to the source and move the keystone that is holding the story together.

There’s a potential trap of putting all the attention on the mind. It’s that we stay reactive and responsive to what the mind is saying. We’re listening and examining. And when we keep putting attention on it, it keeps telling its stories.

This is where it’s helpful to learn how to move your attention from your mind.

The skill of moving your attention away from your mind

To be able to move your attention FROM your mind you need to:

  1. Know how to control, move and shift the quality of your attention.
  2. Have a connection to other parts of you, where you can direct your attention instead.

For many of us, it’s challenging to just follow a direction to “put your attention on your breathing” or “feel your body”. Not because there’s anything wrong with us but because we simply haven’t practiced.

Learning to really control and move your attention, onto consciousness itself, is something that we do in Beyond the Mind. In Being Me we dive deep into forming relationships with other parts of your being – like your breathing, heart, body, life force energy.

When you have those skills, it’s easy to shift your attention and fact-check the story the mind is telling.

When the mind is saying: “I feel like shit”
Check with your body: Breathe and feel how your body is feeling. Does it feel like shit? Or is it just a story that the mind is throwing out there?

Subscribe to the Uncover YOU podcast

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