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We don’t regulate to always feel safe. We regulate so we dare to love and be alive.

What happens when your partner does something that makes you feel unsafe—like giving attention to someone else? And then, when you ask for reassurance, they pull away. In that moment, a familiar question arises: “Am I being triggered by an old wound, or are they actually crossing a boundary?”

When we look back at previous generations and wonder, "Why didn't they teach me how to regulate my emotions or connect with my body?" we're making an assumption that they should have known what we're just now discovering.

Jealousy, when met with curiosity and self-leadership, becomes a guide. Instead of spiraling into blame or self-doubt, you can begin to relate to it from a place of sovereignty and love.

Consider how differently you might approach your inner work if you viewed it as cultivating a garden rather than fixing a problem. When you plant seeds in a garden, you don't expect immediate results. You understand that growth takes time.

This relationship revolution isn't about finding a perfect partner who never triggers your fears. It's about developing the capacity to be with your own emotional responses, giving yourself what you need, and then clearly communicating from that place of wholeness.